TMI

I’ve entitled this post TMI, because by the time you finish reading it, you too will agree that I did in fact share far too much information….BUT, one of my goals in life is that I would be a person who can laugh at myself and just be real. So here it is my friends…the real Emily, for better or for worse and all in the name of true blog-community and being real!

One thing I have learned since becoming a mother is that other moms are known to sit around like war veterans and share stories of battles fought in pregnancy. The nausea, the birth story, the post birth stories. One story topping the next. I have one such story to add to the book of motherhood that I think you will think is quite hilarious…because it happened to me this week.

So, Hong Kong was great. My pregnant self did great the entire trip and managed not to have a single “episode” of morning sickness during my week there. I was careful to pass on offerings of duck head and pig feet and stuck with more recognizable fare. “Keep it safe” is my motto when I travel, especially when pregnant. On early Sunday morning (after an exhausting day Saturday at the event) I boarded my flight home. The first leg of the trip to Tokyo was smooth sailing, however the flight from Tokyo to Atlanta was bumpy, VERY bumpy. I’m already an anxious flyer so when you add serious turbulence into the mix and a pilot who keeps referring to it as “extremely unsafe” I was mess, but I tried to hold it together. For the vast majority of the 14 hour flight home we were violently tossed back and forth. I barely slept, hardly ate, and was tense the entire time. I think I heard the “Hallelujah Course” when the flight finally landed in Atlanta and I got off that plane as fast as I could. I grabbed my luggage, booked my way to my car and chugged an entire bottle of water upon realizing how dehydrated I was. It wasn’t until I was driving up 85N cruising at about 70 miles an hour in traffic that IT ALL HIT ME. The 24+ hours of little to no sleep, 24+ hours of nothing solid to eat, body aching, head pounding, and belly hurting…it all came rushing front and center. My body had had enough and in that moment decided to revolt! I knew I was about to blow so I took a quick Jack Bauer survey of the car and tried to find something to soften the blow, but by then…it was too late. With one hand on the wheel, the other trying to catch whatever vomit I could (very unsuccessfully) it came gushing out like the Icelandic volcano, and all while I’m driving 70mph down the interstate. There was no way to pull over. I just had to let my body do what it had to do. The entire episode lasted about 4 minutes. At first the throwing up was just my body’s way of protesting the last 24 hours and the baby making a statement that I needed to slow down. But after I was COVERED in throw up (and in COMPLETE SHOCK that this was really happening to me) I was so disgusted that the throwing up eventually turned into just throwing up at the fact that I was throwing up everywhere. It was humiliating! I finally managed to get off at an exit and pull into a Chipotle. I sat in disbelief for a moment then promptly stripped down in the parking lot, changed my clothes, and wiped out the car. Then, like any pregnant woman in her right mind I went into Chipotle, order a large burrito, chips, guacamole, and ate the whole entire thing. Who does that!? 🙂 Oh the joys of pregnancy. Good times, I will treasure forever!!

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11 thoughts on “TMI

  1. I just laughed out loud so hard and then had to read it to Adam b/c he wanted to know what I was tripping out for so much! I’m so sorry that happened but I loved the end where you buy a burrito! 🙂

  2. You poor thing! That sounds horrible! I’m so glad you’re feeling better. You need to take care of that baby. (Btw, I think it is a girl.)

  3. Oh my gosh…that’s one of the funniest things I’ve read in a while! Bless your heart! But that’s definitely one for the baby book! Thanks for sharing!

  4. We laughed out loud as we read your story. Very funny. It reminded us of when Heather stopped at the Burger King drive thru to get a Whopper on her way for her hastily scheduled C-section when the twins were born. She knew they would not feed her when she got to the ER, so the momma of twins wanted to make sure she had a full stomach!

  5. I feel bad that I think your post was hilarious!! I know it must have been awful, but what a memory! I’m so glad you had a great time in Hong Kong. I would love to make it to Athens this summer and see you all!

  6. Oh my! So fun! 🙂 Love the joys of pregnancy! 🙂 I remember pulling over on the side of I-55 and getting out of the car (with eighteen wheelers flying past me)…just so I wouldn’t throw up all in my car! Sounds like you had no time to pull over though! 🙂 Fun times!

  7. I’m laughing so hard, but I’m so sorry I’m laughing b/c that sounds absolutely miserable! You poor, poor mama. I don’t even know what I would do. I had my fair share of “morning” sickness (9 months of it) but NEVER an experience like THAT! You are one tough cookie!

  8. I havent really kept up on blogs lately or even updated my own in forever, so I didnt know you were expecting. congratulations!!!!! very exciting. we will have 3 under 3 and a just turning 6 year old here within a few weeks! fun stuff!!!!! just wanted to say congratulations!

  9. hello I just wanted to say hello. My names is James Vogeltanz I am in Omaha Nebraska. I was just goofing off and googling my name when I found your family site

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